4.25
I decided to celebrate my birthday 42 years ago by running a tenth of a mile for every year I have spent wandering the planet which adds up to a 4.2 mile jaunt on the treadmill. I have not run 4 miles since Thanksgiving of 2008. I have not run more than 4 miles period since Ali and I started running some 4 or 5 years ago. I don’t think I EVER ran 4.25 on the treadmill. Pile on top of that the fact that my lower body was still feeling some soreness from the silly weekend athletic competitions. None of that mattered, I had it in my head I wanted to get it done.
I got it done at a not so fast 6.5 mph pace. Aerobically, I am fine exercising at that level for nearly 40 minutes, my breathing never gets labored at all. My legs are what fail me first, they just get tired eventually. I was quite glad to hit the stop button.
When I was about 1.5 miles into the run my mind had already started to wander. A younger girl got on a machine in front of me. The back of her shirt had writing on it. When I looked at it I read:
TEAM FJSSCCA
51
2008-2009
Instantly I am thinking to myself, “WTF? Who is Jessica and why does she have a team of people f’ing her?” I looked again more closely and realized it was actually ‘FJCCSSA’ This happens to me on a pretty regular basis, on first glance I will reverse letters or entire words.
Earlier in the week I had another weird moment. I was on a flat bench getting ready to do chest flies. Next to me standing by a bench were a young girl and two guys. From the looks of them I quickly determined two things, they probably weren’t old enough to drink and they don’t spend a lot of time in the gym. The girl was standing almost right next to me. I would have hit her as I did my reps so I quickly blurted out “Excuse me, I don’t want to bang you.”
Now of course I should have completed the thought and added “with the weights” but I didn’t. The girl just said ‘Oh!’ and moved over. I’m sure she knew what I meant but it sure came out sounding stupid, and creepy….
Sir Randall
”Excuse me, I don’t want to bang you.”
Best……line……EVER!!!!! I laughed so hard I had tears. Classic Duf!!