Staying out of the rabbit hole, Re-VR’d, Pain in the glass

On Monday I got a message from the clinic regarding my blood results.  I tried calling back three times during the afternoon and got voicemail.  So I called again yesterday and finally got through.  Like I mentioned last week they were testing for testosterone and cancer screening markers which came about when I revealed I lost 13-14lbs without really trying so far this year.  I guess the ARNP was being cautious.

So when I call I get transferred to the ARNP.  She tells me my testosterone number was good, 800+ which is higher than I expected.  However she also said the two of the tests for cancer markers were borderline.  One was a PSA test for prostate cancer and the other is a CEA test that measures substances that can be produced by cancer in the body.  She wanted me to come in Thursday to rerun the blood tests to verify the results.  I started having flashbacks to my “borderline” EKG which resulted in a rush of testing that revealed absolutely nothing.  However hearing information that these tests for cancer were not all clean was unsettling, of course.

After I got off the phone I went online and looked at the test results myself and utilized Google to make some sense of it all.  The PSA test interpretation by the ARNP seems off for sure .  There are three things reported on it, your total PSA, your free PSA and %free PSA.  My total PSA number was 1.2 which after researching is very low.  They don’t even pay attention until it is 2.4 and they get more concerned if it is 4.0 or higher.  My free PSA was .3 which meant my %free was 25 which is on the low end of the acceptable range, BUT there was very important information not being looked at.

Under the results it had a chart showing how the info should be interpreted.  It said if your total PSA was less than 2.5, your %FREE is basically irrelevant.  It seems to me like the ARNP just saw one number that was on edge of range and did not look at the rest of the info.  She was saying that maybe she would need to send me to a urologist to have my prostate checked further.  Uh no, we won’t be doing that.

The CEA test result was 3.5.  The “reference range” for this test is 2.5 or less for a non-smoker or 5.0 or less if you smoke. So I was outside the range but not by much.  Again after researching, a HIGH CEA number that causes major alarm is 20 or more.  So again, since I have never had this test before, 3.5 might just be a normal number for me.  So anyway I will let them draw blood again tomorrow but I have already laid out my treatment plan for them.  Test me again in 6 months and see if either number has changed significantly, if they haven’t, I’m good to go .  I think the weight loss is probably mostly pointed at stress and the fact that I just don’t eat as much food as when Cindy cooked for me.  I’m certainly not subjecting myself to another merry go round of testing to only come up with another shoulder shrug at the end.

By the end of the day I found myself being more angry than upset about the test results.  I’m a bit annoyed at the clinic being so eager to shuffle me off for testing.  I wonder if it is a bit of CYA mentality where in order to absolve themselves of any responsibility it is better to over test than under test and potentially miss something. Whatever the case may be, I walked around the house with a bit of a chip on my shoulder the rest of the night. I felt angry and unwilling to relent to the seemingly endless health/pain related issues that keep getting thrown in my face.  When I did my calisthenics in the bar park after work the reps had more edge, anger and intensity to them. Time may be coming for me but I’m not going down easily. I did at least catch another peaceful sunset to temper my anger.

Last night I fired up my Oculus Quest 2 for the first time in months.  It literally could be 6 months or more since I was inside the virtual reality the headset provides.  I think VR is extremely cool and I always had fun and interesting experiences in it but for whatever reason it has just fallen to the wayside.  Other things always take priority or seem more appealing.  The same thing has happened with WoW recently, I have hardly played the game at all the last several months.  I experienced this the last time I was single as well.  I thought I would have all this time to play around, doing whatever I wanted as much as I wanted and whenever I wanted.  Reality was not anything close to what I imagined.

This morning I dropped off the Tacoma to get the windshield replaced.  I still have no idea why the crack, which is now close to two feet long started.  Roughly $400 will take care of the problem.  The Tacoma will be getting some more love in the next month or so as it is overdue for a new set of tires.  I’m almost at 55K miles and still on the original rubber.