Not viable

Last night I decided I wanted to get the mowing done to make my upcoming 3 day weekend less chore filled.  With the amount of daylight in the evenings in mid-October this is becoming less and less viable.  I wound up completing roughly the last half of the mowing via headlights and floodlights.  In addition to it being dark it was chilly.  Our first real cold front of the season has blown in which I love, however the temperatures around 60 combined with a steady wind had me quite cold, even with wearing a hoodie.  The warm shower last night was welcomed.  I dont think weeknight mowing is going be a thing for much longer.  Luckily this colder weather should also put the brakes on the growth rate of the yard. The picture is from the seat of the tractor.

As I have talked about repeatedly over the past year plus, my time being out of a relationship has given me a lot of opportunity to reflect, learn, and analyze some of my patterns, weaknesses and failures that have lead up to this point.   I have realized that in many cases my efforts to fix, please, and help were actually counter-productive in the overall scheme of things.  I think I failed repeatedly in maintaining a steady keel when others escalated arguments.  For arguments to escalate it requires two willing participants.  I should have not been willing to provide fuel for those fires.

I also have realized that there are certain personality traits in women that are absolutely a no go in terms of my ability to have a successful relationship with them.  I never really thought about these type of things in depth. It used to be, she’s attractive and seems nice, let’s roll with it without much more consideration.  There is much more I think about now as I don’t have the time or energy to invest in something that has basic incompatibility from the start.  I want to attract, not chase. The latter is a road to nowhere.