Double dopes

I was treated to witnessing two gym dummies during the same session. Dope number one was Mr Heavy Breather/Grunter.  I have posted about him several times.  He is this big dipshit that never speaks to anybody but insists on grunting and breathing extremely loud during every single exercise he does.  He even breathes loud just walking around, perhaps to let everyone know how hard he is working.  Thankfully I only see the clown once every month or two at the gym. His grunting is just over the top.  It sounds like he is either pushing out a coke can sized log into the shitter or starring in a very loud porno. 

Number two was some younger guy, probably in his early 20’s.  He had a real heavy Jersey accent.  How did I know he had a heavy Jersey accent?  I know because I heard this guy do nothing but talk loudly on his cell phone hands free headset for a half hour straight.  During this half hour he did not touch a single weight or do a single exercise.  He just walked around the gym talking, loudly.  I could hear what he was saying clearly from 50 feet away.  To make matters worse, while he was talking he was constantly admiring himself in the mirror.  He would pause and flex his arm a bit,  pull up the sleeve of his t-shirt and stare at his tattooed appendage. What a clown, I mean come on…