The Disney Experience – A Petri dish of humanity
I recently returned from a Disney trip where we stayed in a townhouse I found on Air BnB. Unlike previous Air BnB experiences, this place was pretty great. They took an old place built in the 90’s and did just enough updates to make it feel modern and cool. It even had a small pool in the back which I utilized a couple times.
During the trip we had two park days with a “rest” day in between which is needed if you want to retain any degree of sanity during a Disney vacation. The Disney days felt more like a test of determination, patience and endurance. To me it felt like something to be survived instead of enjoyed. I have a lot of thoughts about this so I will see if I can express them in a way that doesn’t sound like I am just complaining non-stop.
Let me start with positives. The management and logistics involved in running these parks is mind blowing. Coming up with solutions to managing the needs of thousands of visitors every single day is a monumental task and Disney has it locked in. You never have to look far for the next bathroom our food/drink possibility. The grounds are immaculate. If something gets dropped on the ground within single digit minutes there is a Disney staff member swooping in to clean it up. They allow very little room for guests to mess things up. They have staff directing you at every turn. Even when you get food there is somebody telling you which line to go stand in to keep things flowing as cleanly as possible.

The landscaping is beautiful. The buildings and rides are intricate, detailed and amazing. Walking through the circles of countries in Epcot is a prime example of just how much has gone into making the park a unique experience.
So you may say, wow it sounds like you are gushing with compliments about the parks. What is the issue? The answer is very simple, the hoard of human beings that are clogging every nook and cranny of the park. And before you say it, complaining about the people at an amusement park is like pissing in the wind. They are unavoidable, a truth you can not escape. Let’s break down some of the negatives.
How about cost first? A one day pass to Disney is $180 for one person. They give you a “deal” of $220 if you want to subject yourself to a second day. For for a family of four with a two day pass when you add in $35 to park you are basically spending a grand just to get into the place. This is only “standard” access meaning you get to stand in the “stand by” lines for each ride. The wait times on the rides varied from 15 minutes for the rides that no one cares about to two hours on the thrill rides, which is insane.
For people that have a desire to not stand in line for hours you can purchase a “lightning pass”. This allows you to bypass the majority of the line but for only three rides and one time per ride. This costs $35 additional per person. But wait, it gets better. The real popular rides with monster wait times do not allow you to use the lightning pass. On the second day at Magic Kingdom I paid for lightning passes after some miserable waits at Epcot Center.

If money is no object to you you can buy a “premier pass” add on This gives you unlimited lighting lanes access, sort of. It appears that they still could at their discretion block access to certain rides depending on conditions. The cost for this golden ticket? $400 OMG. So yea it gets crazy.
I made the observation to my girlfriend that most people look miserable. The park to me was a petri dish of modern society. Gluttonous obesity was on display everywhere. There were far more people that were significantly obese by BMI standards than not. Then we had the addiction to phones on display everywhere. People would be bumping into you routinely because they had their face down scrolling an IG feed, it was maddening. The kids walking around with souvenirs that will likely be stuffed in a drawer or thrown away once their magical experience was over. This was the ultimate display of consumerism and I here I was in the middle of it, contributing.
My lower body felt rather awful most of the time between walking tons on my aching knees to standing and shuffling in lines for hours upon hours. All of this was done with temps in the 90’s with high humidity so it was just not fun.
We stayed for the fireworks on our Magic Kingdom day. We did not get home until after midnight because of the frustrating way you have to access Magic Kingdom. There is a tram or ferry that takes you to/from the park and a shuttle that takes you from the parking lot. When we tried to leave after the fireworks we ran into a literal river of people all trying to leave. I was so done. mentally and physically.
I felt like the days in the parks was about completing a mental challenge. Just how much frustration. discomfort and misery can I endure while paying a premium price for the privilege of doing so? When the second day was finally done I almost felt like I completed a half marathon. I didn’t enjoy Disney, I survived it. I left the park feeling even less hopeful for the future of humanity than I already did, probably not the goal Walt was reaching for.



