Unexpected, Knock it out now

Early in the day Monday I got a Fedex tracking notice that a package from Omaha Steaks was coming. Say what?  I had no idea what it could be other than, steak?  Was someone pranking me?  Well as promised a big insulated chest showed up late in the afternoon, however I saw the packing list was all non-meat items along with several deserts.  The card revealed this was from my dad and Teresa, a unique and useful gift. I had just loaded up on Trader Joe’s frozen meals on Friday so I had to do some very creative rearranging in my freezer to make room but I got it all in there.  I made the butternut squash risotto last night.  It was quite good.

As predicted my Monday was low key.  I played WoW, getting another character to max level and starting leveling another.  I watched some tv and also played with my Switch, which I have set up in the bedroom.  It was nothing productive but it felt kind of nice to not be that way, at least for a short while. Oh wait, I forgot I did sand and repaint the AC intake grate in the bedroom.  It looked like at some point something corrosive was sprayed on it which made it start to rust.  It looks much better now.

So I figured I would get the end of year wrap up knocked out, sure there are a few days left in 2021 but I think the story has already been written.  It goes without saying that the script on the year was officially flipped, with future plans being crumpled up and tossed away.  Let’s see what I HOPED would happen in 2021.

I had hopes to do a road trip in 2021.  I did actually wind up driving out to Texas and back on Thanksgiving to visit my sister’s family, so I guess I can mark that as complete.

My physical goals were to not get hurt, more.  My lower back continued to be my biggest pain point in 2021.  I gave up running for road biking and it seems to be a smart move.  I have actually dropped 6-7lbs since Cindy moved out which I have wanted to do for awhile anyway.

None of the potential major projects I listed happened like window replacement, pool repairs, fence post replacement, or house paint. I suck.

I hoped the 3D store would continue to grow as well as content creation. I also wanted to emphasize paying down debt.  Unfortunately the opposite has happened.  Additional competition with 3D printed EUC parts providers has dramatically cut down on my store sales, I have not run numbers but I would not be surprised if I make half of what I made last year on the store.  My YouTube numbers have continued to edge upwards but not the type of growth I would like.  I have been knocking down debt at a decent clip which I wall talk more about later.

I hoped that Joe Biden era would wash away the toxic Trumpism.  Unfortunately it has not and the cult mentality is still strong in America.  Don’t get me wrong, I am not thrilled with what Joe has done and some of it I flat out disagree with (ie. vax mandates).  The bottom line is I will take it over the Trump era any day.

I wrapped up my hopes with gratitude for having “a partner in life that loves and supports me the best she can”.  Well there is a lot I could dig into there but let’s just say that didn’t work out, either. It’s been the biggest change in my life direction in the last almost 9 years.

Ok so let me examine the past year some more.

Let’s talk about my automotive roller coaster in 2021.  There has been a bunch of changes in my four wheeled universe.  I did some more work on the Prius that I gave to Katie a couple years prior, fixing the headlights for like the fourth time.  Unfortunately the car had other problems that made her not want to drive it much.  She wound up selling it for cheap.  The thing had something like 235,000 miles on it when it was let go, the most miles of any vehicle I ever owned.

My 2021 Tesla ownership saga was pretty freaking crazy with me buying not one but TWO Model Y’s.  The first one was a base model where I lucked into a three day 2K discount, allowing me to buy one for less than I paid for my Model 3, because I opted for no FSD.  It was a great car, but I sold it after only four months. Why? Because I was able go sell the car outright to Vroom for 10K more than the base price because of the insane used car price escalation. The Vroom selling process was frustrating at times, especially when it came to confirming the loan on the Model 3 was paid off but in the end it worked out.  I used the net profit on the sale to fund a NEW Model Y, the long range model with dual motors.  It was a once in a lifetime series of good luck for me that I doubt will ever repeat in the future.  I love my Tesla(s).

I had my second colonoscopy in the spring. There was some advantage to doing it a second time, I was able to get through the awful prep a little easier and the results of the probing was better, giving me 5 a year respite this time instead of 3 years.

My PEV collection morphed in 2021. I sold my One Wheel Pint, Kingsong S18 and Kingsong 16X.  I added an Inmotion V12 and a used Ninebot Z10.  Most weeks I still struggle to find time to ride more than once a week.  I still love riding and love making videos about riding, I just don’t get to participate as often as I would like.

Although there weren’t any major home improvements there were a number of minor ones, mostly initiated by Cindy, she created or redid several landscape features, filling them mostly with succulents.  We also bought/planted a guava tree in the front yard.  The new areas look nice but in the end I have hard time focusing on their pleasant visual and instead being annoyed it is something additional for me to weed/maintain. She also redid the garden area with my help.  It was cut in size by almost a half but had three large raised beds installed. I also laid something like 7 pallets of bahia sod myself in the front/side yard.  It was one of the more miserable tasks I have taken on recently.

I remember thinking at the end of 2020 that at least covid would fade away in 2021.  When I got my moderna vaccinations in April I looked forward to a return to somewhat normalcy.  To a degree that happened, especially in Florida but the covid fear train never got derailed.  The promise the vaccination meant your risk of developing covid was near zero was a falsehood that when wrapped with other falsehoods really has shifted my viewpoint on the entire ordeal.  I have not gotten a booster and don’t plan to unless there is some other objective I have that would need it.  I wonder how many more variants we have to look forward to in 2022.  Omicron appears to be spreading like mad, the good news it it appears to be less severe in consequences.

I had one major household repair, the AC air handler.  The main coil sprung a leak and I opted to replace it than try to patch it.  I am not sure how long the leak was going on but I am guessing for awhile, causing the unit to be inefficient in cooling, resulting in longer run times.  The reason I say this is once it was repaired I noticed a pretty significant decrease in house power consumption.

While we are talking power, the whole house solar system came much closer to delivering what I hoped for when it was installed, providing fully for the houses electrical needs.  In 2020 I was unhappy that I paid for something like 5500 kilowatt hours of AC.  So far in 2021 it looks like I have only paid for 700 kilowatt hours.  The difference I think is less usage.  Between getting the AC fixed, less 3D printing, and only having one person in the household since September, my numbers are approaching break even.  I anticipate getting there in 2022.

In addition to the road trip to Texas, I forgot Cindy and I also took the Tesla to Cape Canaveral in June for a long weekend to see the space center and surrounding area.  At the time I thought it was a precursor to getting back to the full 10-14 day road trips we used to take.  It was an enjoyable experience for me as I continue to be fascinated by everything and anything space related, even to this day.

I sold one of my two investment properties in Lehigh Acres which has sat like an albatross around my neck since 2003.  It’s funny how “only” losing around 40% of what I paid seems like a win nowadays.  I applied the money to the home equity loan I used to pay for it nearly two decades ago, the only remaining debt I owe on the house.

I am down to four remaining chicks in my flock.  In 2021 I had the emotionally brutal task of deciding to have Cupcake put down.  She had developed some sort of awful infection in her belly.  The vet thought perhaps she had an egg break inside of her.  The end result was her gut being swollen beyond belief.  I spent several hundred dollars to determine that spending a couple thousand dollars more for exploratory surgery that likely would not change the end result would be a waste of resources.  Telling the vet to put her down was awful for me.  Up until that point Cupcake was one of the few chickens that never had a serious health issue at all.  She was always happy and by my side, looking for whatever treats I could give her.  Of the four remaining birds, only Fiona appears to be 100% healthy.  Kathy and Popcorn seem to have eternal diarrhea, despite  my repeated attempts to treat them for worms.  Cutie has bad legs that make it hard for her to walk.  I pick her up and transport her whenever I can.  Once these hens pass on my days as a chicken farmer will officially be at their end.

Sadie has been declining as well.  Her weight gain over the covid lockdown period appeared to have a direct correlation with her joint issues.  Recently Ali started taking her to physical therapy which seems to be helping some.  Ali sold her place and moved into a one bedroom apartment temporarily so there is next to no inside exercise for Sadie, it all has to be gotten outdoors for the most part.  Since the place Ali moved to is further away I have not had Sadie over to the house nearly as much which I feel badly about.

While talking about loss, I attended the memorial from one of the guys in the running club.  He died from cancer.  He was one of those guys that was all about good energy, he had a smile for everyone.  Even though I only saw him once or twice since I left the running club I felt I needed to go to honor his memory.  It was sad but an appropriately upbeat tribute to a man that had such a positive impact on so many people’s lives.

Katie giving birth to her second child Emily in November was a 2021 big life event that I was mostly on the outside of because of what is talked about next.

Ok so although I could talk more in detail about other events of the past year, obviously the mutual decision Cindy and I made to end our relationship overshadows anything else in the last 365 days.  This decision was difficult as you can imagine and we made it saying we both wanted to remain friends and hope for happiness for the other down the road.  That is the understanding I have been working under since the split.

I am very much a person that is most comfortable in a relationship.  I love the feeling of having a partner you can count on to have your back, to be your support when needed, to share experiences with.  Because of that trait, I have been in one long term relationship or another almost non-stop my entire adult life.  This desire also can be to my detriment clearly, if you look back at some stuff that has gone down.  Even though we weren’t officially married, Cindy and I lived as a married couple for 8 years and I see the end of the relationship congruent with a third failed marriage.  Because of that, I think it has been important for me to really think about why this is and what can be done to avoid the scenario in the future.

Adjusting to living alone has been challenging in so many ways.  The sudden waves of sadness and other emotions that roll in and out routinely are tough to manage.  I am working on building emotional “breakers” to hopefully make this less impactful as time moves on.  Managing the household has become more oppressive but that will always be the case when the workforce gets cut in half.  It’s gotten to the point where for the first time in my life I am considering scenarios involving selling the house I had built and lived in for 21 years.  I have always been most comfortable working inside of routines and known guidelines.  A situation like this removes a lot of what I used to count on as a constant.  The adjustment has been challenging this year and will continue to be so into the future.

So yea I thought 2020 sucked, turns out 2021 sucked more, something I did not think was possible.  So I’ll try to come up with 2022 guidance.

Do I have any home improvements in mind?  The same ones I listed last year are still on the table although I don’t feel pressed to do any of them. It would be great if I can continue to pay down debt as I try to align with retirement that is now close to 8 years away.  Selling that other property would be a nice bonus.

Fitness goals are really just about trying to slow the decline which is inevitable.  Road biking is a nice way to try to push my cardio without the pounding of running.  I would actually like to see if I can get my body weight a few lbs lower yet while maintaining whatever strength levels I still have.

Travel plans are always a possibility.  I would love to finally get out to California to hang with some of my virtual EUC friends that I have communicated with for years.  Another conventional road trip may happen to see either the PA or Texas branch of my family.

There looks to be a change in my job responsibilities coming in my department in 2022 which would see me taking over due to retirement of my longtime buddy who happens to be in charge.  It shouldn’t be a drastic change from what I do now but it will definitely be a little different.

My relationship status in 2022 will be an absolute wildcard.  My experience doing mostly online dating the last time I was single makes me very hesitant to go that route again.  I think I would much rather have something happen organically, if it happens at all.  Maybe I will be single this time next year as well.  If I am, at least I hopefully am better adjusted to that reality.

Sorry for the mostly negative report card for the year.  Being fake with my feelings isn’t something I am very adept at.  My hope is next year at this time I can clearly identify that this was the bottom and the path ahead once again has bright skies, trusted friends, and opportunities taken.