Since it’s just you and me

Ever since I switched the blog to require registration to read I have a nice and tidy audience although I am constantly having to go in to clean out garbage registrations from bots. With the audience being small and presumably familiar with my history I feel more able to speak freely although of course there are certain lines that can’t be or at least should not be crossed.

Ever since I split with Cindy some 20 months ago at this point (wow), I have been struggling to figure out how to navigate life as a reasonably content single person that still is open to bringing a partner into their life. It has been in a word, hard.

My people pleasing nature has backfired on me repeatedly over my lifetime and still does today, over a half century into my existence. In those last 20 months there have been a couple brief attempts at getting relationships off the ground but they never got enough altitude or velocity to stay in the air.

Aspects of these experiences have made me even more cautious and skeptical about women. My ability to trust has been impacted significantly. My desire to go through the process to filter through the bullshit and get to who a person really is, is waning. Yet I know with a real partner, life can be awesome. However, you need to be able to make your life awesome on your own as well. I will continue to push myself into uncomfortable places to get there.

When a person tells you who they are, listen. When a person shows you who they are, believe them.