Archives November 2022

Yesterday I had the PM done on my AC.  With the smell I noticed after the trip I was curious what the service would turn up.  The tech said my drain line was not flowing well and he attributed it to the smell.  Hopefully that’s all it was but I probably should resume sucking out the drain line myself every couple months, I just fell out of the habit for whatever reason.

As the AC guy was getting close to finishing up Kerri showed up to make us dinner.  We actually had bought the groceries to do so on Monday. She made a pasta primavera dish that turned out really well.  She has told me repeatedly she doesn’t cook but somehow manages to prepare healthy and good tasting meals repeatedly.  We wanted to drink the red wine I had sitting in a cabinet since summer of 2021 but when I went to look for the wine opener I realized I no longer owned one. That happens routinely nowadays, I discover stuff that I used to have in the house is no longer there. I did a quick run to Publix to secure a new opener. The wine was good and hit me equally well.  It lead to funny, quality conversation that I appreciated and enjoyed.  It was an excellent meal overall as well but I can’t say I’m surprised.

I finally got around to posting some of the footage I recorded during the drive to PA.  I need to add chapters as it’s on the longer side but there are some interesting moments in there for sure.

I took off my Apple Watch this morning.  I have complained recently about the dog whistle effect it has on me with it’s constant beeps, rings, vibrations and chimes, offering constant distraction which I don’t think is good for me overall.  So I am leaving it on the table for now and if it returns to my arm it will be with almost all notifications silenced. I need less information, not more in my life.

I guess I haven’t had time to recap anything since my return from PA on Sunday afternoon.  I pulled out of Todd’s place a little before 7AM.  I gave everyone hugs and thanked them for their hospitality.  Of course I also gave big hugs to Oakley and Bailey, my canine niece and nephew. I knew that I was going to push myself to go as long and as far as I could tolerate.  Luckily driving 15 hours plus in a Tesla is pretty enjoyable.  I used a lot of music to keep me going since I had already consumed the podcasts I am subscribed to.  Coffee was consumed three different times during the day as well.  I managed to avoid the DC traffic this time but got stuck in a mess near Richmond that slowed my progress by maybe an hour.

I was eager to get back and my vehicle speed reflected it.  Most the time I had autopilot programmed to maintain 80 miles an hour.  If traffic around me was moving faster than that, so did I.  The first 10 hours or so went ok, the last 5 involved some Jedi mind tricks to keep moving forward.  Kerri gave me a few calls during the day to check in on me and keep me alert, which I appreciated greatly.  My last charging stop for the day was in Brunswick Georgia.  There was a Hilton right near it.  I paid nearly $200 to lay my head on a pillow for around 6 hours which was stupid but I was too tired to care.

I set my alarm for 5:45 and drug myself out of bed.  My body said “what the f are you doing?” but as always, my inner taskmaster won out as I got ready in 15 minutes and was back in the car, skipping the complimentary breakfast because 7AM was just too late for me to wait around.  I crossed into Florida in a little over a half hour and the push was on.  Despite having a great trip I just wanted to get home, ASAP.  The miles flowed pretty quickly.

Just as I did on the trip up, my path took me right past Babcock which was convenient since I had to pick up Elsa.  When I walked in Ali’s place she was unsure for a split second but when she realized it was me she went crazy, dancing around and being adorable.  It was great having her with me for the last hour of my journey home.  I managed to pull into the driveway somewhere around 3:30, a much better day, cutting nearly 8 hours off my Saturday travel time.

As soon as I walked into the house I got hit by a mildew smell which surprised me.  I left the AC at its normal setting for the trip so I didn’t get it.  I immediately jumped into action opening windows, cranking the two air filters in the house and lighting a candle.  The thermostat was set a degree lower than I recall leaving it at so I am not quite sure what the deal was.  Luckily things returned to normal after an hour or so but I do have my AC company coming to do the overdue 6 month maintenance today.

I was like a whirlwind, trying to get things sorted out.  I was darting around the house, at times starting one task, remembering something else I had to do, start that and then jump backward to finish the other task.  It happened 11 or 12 times at least, crazy.  I was rushing because Kerri was coming out to visit which was great.  We talked a lot during my trip but I was of course better to see her in person.

I took Monday off as well.  Whenever I am away I feel like I have a log jam of work around the house that MUST be completed immediately.  Well yesterday I realized that isn’t necessarily the case.  Sure I got some stuff done but I wound up spending a good portion of the day doing things I enjoyed instead of things that were on the long mental list that is always circulating.  Sometimes it feels like 23 out of 24 hours of my day are spent doing, thinking, or planning various aspects of my life.  I am hoping this holiday season is filled with a lot more special moments instead of tasks.  The work will get done but the fun and enjoyable parts of life can’t be sacrificed as a result. I mean washing sheets and making the bed is necessary but not very memorable.

It was a great experience for me to see my friends and family up north.  It reinforced my desire to connect more, generally speaking, in my life.  I am grateful for many, many things and feel fortunate to keep moving away from the dark and dreary days that enveloped this same time period last year.

Today I woke up to rainy weather and an indefinite game plan.  After grabbing DD, I decided I wanted to visit the good old Berkshire Mall and I emphasize old.  It was Black Friday after all.  This mall was a staple of my childhood, it was cool to go to the mall, always.  The biggest draw for me was the kick ass arcade that used to reside on the second floor.  I spent an infinite amount of hours and quarters in that place.

I snapped a picture of the seating around the center court area, unchanged since my earliest memories of them.  I recall sitting there and watching the old fountains dance in front of me, many, many times.

Of course everyone knows that brick and mortar shopping, especially malls are a dinosaur nowadays.  Even with this being the busiest shopping day of the year the place was not jammed.  All of the big stores had closed, leaving only Boscov’s as the lone survivor.  I went in a few stores that interested me and actually bought a couple items but the real deal was just being back in a space that was such a big part of growing up. It was a bit surreal.

I grabbed lunch at another old staple, V&S sandwich shop.  Todd said V&S has gone downhill significantly in recent years.  My tuna sub was quite good and I had no complaints whatsoever.  However at 11:45 AM there were only 4 or 5 customers in the place which was a bit shocking.

The rain had stopped so playing more pickleball immediately jumped into my head.  However my hip was sore from falling on it after crashing on the OneWheel on Thanksgiving and both of my knees had some annoying soreness going on.  Like a true addict I ignored these things.  I stopped at CVS and bought two knee braces, popped some Advil back at the house and headed out. Todd and Mindy were out setting up for some monster craft show all day long so it worked out.

I headed back to West Reading, hopeful to get some games in.  The courts were not as packed as they were on Tuesday afternoon but before long I was able to get in on a game.

I honestly am not sure how many games I played in total but I do know that I played for somewhere around 3 hours.  Early on I was not playing great but as I warmed up my play did too.  I finished off the session winning 4 or 5 games in a row.  It was a ton of fun.

Everyone I played with, except one guy that got a little salty if he thought you made a mistake, was very nice.  The social aspect of pickleball where everyone is able to detach from the madness of the world that surrounds us and just enjoy playing is something that is very endearing to me.

Tonight Todd and I had dinner at the Ranch House ANOTHER staple of my childhood.  I used to love going there to get burgers, fries, and a massive chocolate milkshake.  The reason we chose it was this is where my niece is working so we sat in her section.  There is absolutely nothing notable about this place other than it still has it’s straight out of the 70s feel.  Both Todd and my meal was good and it was fun having Caroline be our server.

Tonight I did some prelim packing for my early departure tomorrow.  My plan is to be up by 6 and on the road by 7 so I can burn through as many miles as humanly possible tomorrow.  It’s going to be grueling but I have mentally prepared myself for the journey.  It’s been a great holiday visit.  I hope to make them a more regular part of my life.

We were supposed to get up to my dad and step mom’s place around 1:30 for our Thanksgiving meal.  The gang at Todd’s house and Mindy’s mom all piled into their tank-sized Q45 for the ride.  The vehicle was stuffed with people, food, and we even found room for my One Wheel.  When we pulled up to their house I was surprised to see my brother Patrick’s car there, I thought he was staying in Pittsburgh with his girlfriend.  It was a treat that he was there.

Shortly after we arrived my sister Meg, Paul and their two little girls arrived.  Yes, the same two little girls I had so much fun with in the Adirondacks in July.  It took very little time for them to start engaging me to play with them.  Of course I was happy to oblige.

The meal was split across two tables since there were so many people.  As is always the case, my step mom did an amazing job preparing the food and laying out everything in a beautiful way.  I sat at the younger table which provided a lot of entertainment, especially from Cadence and Kennedy. Another special part of the meal was my dad and Teresa had actually secured and prepared a Tofurkey for me which they certainly did not need to do.  It was a very thoughtful gesture.

Of course football was on throughout the day which we watched off and on as we entertained the girls.  Eventually we moved outside.  I mentioned I brought my OneWheel but Patrick also brought his Segway S2 EUC that I bought him several years ago.  In addition my dad had a golf cart that the girls like riding around on so a plan was devised.  Todd drove the golf cart with the girls while Patrick and I gave chase on our PEV’s.

Todd had a clear advantage on the grass in a four wheel vehicle.  Patrick and I had to be more careful on the very uneven and slightly frozen ground so we couldn’t keep up.  We could however cut angles and get through small spots that they could not.  The girls loved it.

At one point I thought I would show off for Paul and decided to try to jump the OneWheel from one level of the patio to another, some 8-10 inches lower.  Well I didn’t have enough speed and I hit the edge a bit angled instead of straight.  The end result was my eating shit, falling pretty hard on my right hip and elbow.  Of course I was not wearing the safety gear which I had in the vehicle, stupid.  I was wearing a long sleeve shirt and a thick hoodie when I fell so it helped somewhat.  I did entertain the idea of putting on gear and trying again but I reconsidered.

Everyone started leaving around 6ish. It was great seeing everyone, and made me appreciate the effort Teresa put into making it all happen.  Even though I don’t get to see my family much being thousands of miles away, I do love and miss them.

When we got back to Todd’s place I assisted in the holiday transition process.  Mindy is very stylish and decorates the house accordingly.  I was the pack mule in the process helping to transport items and bins up and down the steps as Thanksgiving decor was replaced with Christmas flavor.  The amount of decorations they have is staggering, making me appreciate that my Christmas decorations all fit in a couple bins in the garage.  I also realized that if Mindy saw how I decorate my house for Christmas with inflatables and various light styles and colors, she would probably cringe.

I slept like a log last night.  Today is my last day before pulling out early tomorrow morning so I will be running around looking for a couple things.  It is Black Friday after all.

Yesterday during the day things were slower paced than Tuesday where I had three meet ups with friends in addition to an extended pickleball session. I did get out in the afternoon to ride my OneWheel around the path at Grings Mill.  The gravel trail along the water was a blast to ride, I absolutely loved it.  I also got to see the volleyball courts I used to play on 20+ years ago as well as get a brief workout in on their outdoor exercise stations.  I had a great time in the crisp but not cold weather.

I got back and cleaned up for my trip down to Lancaster to meet up with my longtime friend Troy. I communicate with Troy regularly but had not seen him in person for at least 7 years, possibly longer.  This was not just a regular visit, I also was going to be participating in the podcast Troy hosts for his fantasy football league.

I got there around five.  I got to finally meet Troy’s girlfriend Jess in person.  I could sense immediately she was a good person and was comfortable talking to her immediately.  The other two co-hosts showed up 20-30 minutes later.  It was funny, they had no idea I was going to be there.

For two decades plus I have been involved with this league but only in a comical way.  My communication was always electronic, so much so that some league owners thought I was a made up person that existed only in Troy’s mind.  I never met Mike and Jerry before but again, I almost felt like I already knew them from my interactions from afar.

So normally the podcast is an audio only production but I told Troy I would bring my laptop so we could livestream the broadcast as well.  I set up my computer in the corner of the room and let it capture the nearly two hours of silliness that followed.  Jess was sweet and ran alcohol to us as needed and there was a lot of need.  I am not quite sure how many alcoholic beverages I consumed but I think I hit double digits.  I thought the podcast went really well and was pretty funny, at least to those of us in the room.

After we wrapped up Jerry and Mike shoved off but I stuck around.  I had already mentioned to Troy the idea that if I drank a lot I could crash in his spare room which he was fine with.  Troy, Jess and I stayed up late just talking about a wide variety of subjects that flowed one into the other. By the time we went to bed it was midnight.  The evening had definitely lived up to my expectations and was a reminder of why I needed to get face to face with my friends more often.

I woke up in the morning feeling extremely dehydrated but not as hung over as I feared based on what I drank.  Jess made Troy and I coffee and breakfast. (did I mention she is a sweetheart) We sat around the dining room table and jumped right back into talking about things freely.  Part of me wished I had more time to hang but I had to get back to get ready to go our big get together this afternoon which supposedly will have something like 16 people.  If that number is accurate it will be the largest Thanksgiving group I have ever been a part of.

I’m expecting another good experience to pile on top of the sizeable amount I have already accumulated.  I hope anyone reading this has a great Thanksgiving where you get to share time with those you love and cherish.

For the majority of my visits back to PA in the last 10 years they have been pretty in and out, meaning I would arrive for a specific event and then have very little time to just hang with anyone else.  I’m not sure if I did this because I always felt the need to get back as soon as possible to resume household duties, like the chickens specifically, or if it was just my general overall avoidance of extended contact with others.  However now, with no more responsibilities at home that I feel guilty about putting on others shoulders, I wanted to embrace seeing my friends. This is one reason I shifted my departure time a day earlier, to give me more flexibility. The end result was today being one of the best and fulfilling days I have felt in a long time.  I was out the entire day, leaving at 9AM and not getting back after 7:30.

My first stop was Dunkin Donuts followed by the supercharger.  Last night I plugged into Todd’s garage but only gained about 11% of charge even after going all night.  After topping off the battery I stopped at my buddy Charlie’s sports simulation shop.  He has a bunch of indoor simulators for golf and other sports.  This was his dream after being a programmer for most of his life.

He has had a rough go of it, covid almost shut him down but he has endured.  I hung out there for over two hours, just hanging and talking.  I also brought my One Wheel inside to show Charlie.  I had to let it sit for at least a half hour until the battery was warm enough to allow it to be ridden.  In the past I have described Charlie as one of the nicest human beings I know.  He still holds the title.  I gave him a a hug and headed out for my next reunion.

I contacted my long time friend Cheryl on my way to Charlie’s, also asking if she wanted to meet up, this time for lunch.  She had a lunch date planned but said she could meet me right afterward at 3rd and Spruce, a place I had not been to in well over a decade.  I had not seen Cheryl in about 5 years.  Like Charlie, we met when she worked in IT with me.  Like Charlie, she decided to leave IT and became a real estate agent instead, which she has become very good at.

Since she just ate Cheryl had a few drinks while I ordered some food.  Despite the lapse in face to face contact it didn’t take long for us to fall back into a place where we just talking freely, catching each other up with the latest and greatest in each others lives.  We were there until after three, past the lunch rush.  By the time we left we were the only two patrons in the entire establishment, it was a bit surreal.  I gave Cheryl a big hug and told her how nice it was to see her, because it was.  Despite being in Florida for over 22 years I only have a few friends down there that I am close to like the people I have seen today.  Cheryl sent me a text after she left reiterating how nice it was to see me which made me happy.

So during our talk I mentioned how pickleball was a new thing for me.  She mentioned there were new courts in West Reading that I could check out.  Oh really???? I was not supposed to meet up with Rich until 6 so I decided to go check it out.  What I found was pretty amazing. The courts were teeming with players, despite temperatures in the upper 40’s.  I walked down and mingled for a bit before asking if it was open play, he said it was.  They had a simple system where you just put your paddle in a holster, when courts came free whomever paddles are next play.

Even though I was not dressed to play, with jeans and normal sneakers I couldn’t pass up the opportunity.  I always have my paddle in the Tesla so I grabbed it and got into a game within a few minutes.  I thought I would play a game or two and be good.  Instead I played for a couple hours almost, right up to 15 minutes before I was supposed to meet Rich.  Despite it being the coldest weather I ever played in once I got moving the temps didnt bother me much.

There were a lot of solid players there.  I had wins and losses with a mixed bag of decent to bad play on my side.  It didn’t really matter though, I had fun.  There is a solid chance I will wind up back there before I head back south and I won’t be wearing jeans the next time.

Whenever I am back in PA it always amazes me how compact everything feels.  In Florida pretty much anything takes a half hour to get to.  The place I was meeting Rich at seemed like it was on the other side of town but I still managed to make it in 15 minutes right on time at 6.

I snuck in behind Rich and tapped his shoulder followed by a hug.  I had not seen him in 5 years as well.  Rich was a little quiet at first which I understood because of some tough things he has been dealing with for awhile.  However I slowly got him talking and then got him laughing.  Before the session was over I got to see the friend that I played volleyball with for so many years.  It was good to get through to him and he thanked me for doing so.  It felt great to connect with my friend in a non-virtual way.

The day was really about as good as I could have asked for.  I had meaningful, prolonged time with three of my friends that I shared so many moments with in the past.  I am thankful for some of the work I have put in during the last year plus that made me more appreciative of opportunities like this and made me reach out to initiate them.  I’m hoping the trip has more of the same.

Tomorrow evening I am hanging with Troy with whom I have shared some of the most crazy moments of my life with.  I have a feeling tomorrow night might be making that list.

This is going to be a very abridged version of the last two days that contained something like 24 hours of time on the road. It’s late and I’m tired.  I also shot some video along the way that you can check out in the future.  I dropped off Elsa late Saturday morning at Ali’s after I buzzed around mowing the property earlier in the morning.  I thought it would be good to get her dropped off early so I could focus on what I needed to get done before leaving.  It was good in that regard.  What was not good was just how empty the house felt Saturday night without her there, it made me sad.

I left the house Sunday about 7:45, steeling myself for what I knew would be a very, very long day.  The long range battery did well.  I made it out of the state while only having to charge once, I think that is the first time that has happened.  I decided to spend the $200 to get full self driving turned back on for a month.  The automatic lane change feature it includes is very welcome during long road trips as it makes changing lanes easy and safer.

One thing I was not happy about was for the first time ever I had to pay to supercharge.  In the past I had free supercharging because of all of the Tesla referrals I had.  Tesla has now killed that program and also killed any miles that had not been used yet which I think really sucks.  I had over 20K free miles that got evaporated.  As a result I will likely be spending a couple hundred dollars on charging on the trip.

I did get to stop at some different supercharger spots which resulted in a bunch of different random encounters like having dinner at a bowling alley and shopping at a Food Lion late at night.  I really like the rolling of the dice that occurs when hitting the open road.

I knew I wanted to push to see how far I could get the first day so day 2 was easier.  I wound up going until after 11PM, winding up about 20 miles inside the North Carolina border.  I booked a room at Holiday Inn, showered and was out.  It was a grind you into the dirt sort of day.

I woke up today without an alarm a little after 6, eager to roll.  The cold weather stung my skin when I went outside with temps in the 20s.  The Tesla seat heater came in handy.  The drive today started out gloriously with clear blue skies.  A little of that luster was lost during the afternoon when I was ensnared in awful traffic in the DC/Baltimore area, resulting in my getting to Todd’s place an hour later than originally expected.

It was great to see Todd, Mindy and the girls.  I last saw them briefly in July when we met for dinner after the upstate NY trip.  I also got a very excited hello from their two huge dogs Bailey and Oakley.  Even though it had been a couple years since I saw them they seemed to remember who their favorite uncle was.

Caroline and I went to go pick up food they ordered for dinner.  It was a nice opportunity for us to catch up on what the latest and greatest is with her.  She is a big fan of the Tesla.  I had a sweet surprise waiting for me in the bathroom. Caroline laid out everything for me hotel style to make me feel at home.  It was thoughtful and I appreciated it, a lot.

Todd and Mindy have to work some tomorrow.  I am going to see two of my friends during the day, Charlie in the morning and Rich around dinner.  I have not seen Charlie in at least 3 years and the last time I saw Rich was for my 50th birthday party.  I look forward to catching up with both of my long term and dear friends.

This week will be all about appreciation and gratitude.

Sorry this isn’t longer but it’s all I got….

With only two full days remaining before I pull out for PA I have a lot of things on my mental to do list to address before I leave.  Tonight I hope to get the weeding done somehow before all daylight is gone.  Tomorrow I need to mow, wash the Tesla, drop Elsa off at Ali’s and then of course pack for the trip.  I was a bit surprised at just how cold the forecast temperatures are for Reading next week.  I will definitely need to be bringing full on winter wear. As I have been trying to do for most trips anymore, I’ll have my laptop(s) with so I can document the trip as it progresses instead of trying to do one large and historically incomplete brain dump at the end.

This week I have had several posts that included windows into some of the ongoing personal challenges and self analysis that I have been and will continue doing as I move forward.  My hope is putting in the work pays dividends in the long term happiness department.  The journey never ends.

Last night on my way home from work I decided I wanted to stop at SportClips and get a fresh “skin fade” hair cut for my trip to PA next week.  I was hoping to see the stylist I had the first time but she was busy so I got called back by a woman named Suzanne instead.  Suzanne was older than me, I think, she could have just had a rough road.  She sat me down and within the first couple minutes she asked me if I had heard if Trump declared to run for president or not, evidently she didn’t hear the news.  I told her he did officially declare which she seemed excited about.  I then mentioned how there is already controversy between him and Desantis.  She did not seem to know of the rumors of Ron potentially running for president.

So there were times when just the revelation of someone’s affinity for Trump would hit the immediate off switch for me.  I would close the door to any further significant communication.  However I did not choose to dwell on her political preferences.  I noticed she was limping so I asked her what was wrong.  She said her feet have been a mess for years from a lifetime of being on them, she said she has been a hairdresser her entire life.  In an attempt to get by she has been getting steroid injections but she evidently had some sort of reaction that now has caused extreme pain in one of her feet.  I immediately felt compassion for her.

We continued to talk about her history, where she is from, what she drives, where she lives and a variety of other things.  She buzzed me down, probably a little more aggressively than the other woman but it still looked better than anything I could muster.  When I checked out I decided to leave her a 50% tip.  Cutting through to the human being inside of political facades felt good.  Her life sounded anything but easy and I hoped to help in a tiny way. I definitely do enjoy having someone else cut my hair.

I had a weird revelation last night while I was in bed listening to a guided meditation.  In these exercises you are just trying to unplug your brain, not think about the countless things that normally occupy the space.  I have been asked and have talked about the weird phenomenon where in normal human conversation I typically am very terse and to the point, rarely communicating more than the bare minimum with a few exceptions.  However stick me in front of camera shooting a video or live streaming, the gag comes off and I talk incessantly.  It has always been a bizarre contrast that I never really understood the reason behind, until now.

What I realized during meditation is my overly active brain is once again the culprit.  When I am talking to people I find myself instantly analyzing their facial expressions, body language and demeanor towards me.  I use this information to gauge their level of interest in what I am saying.  Because I have a loud inner critic more often than not my analysis will be they are tuned out, uninterested, or something else with a negative aspect. The normal end result of this is getting out of the conversation, at times awkwardly.  Some times I will also be scrambling to figure out what to say next when the conversation swings back my way.  Depending on what state my brain is and the person I am speaking to, this can be another difficult/awkward sticking point.

So what I realized last night is when I am talking to a recording device that roadblock and analysis is removed.  My brain is not required to analyze my interaction/words and their affect on somebody else.  I can just, talk.  It may seem like an odd revelation to most but it was a moment of clarity for myself, how my overactive brain is the root cause of a lot of dysfunction in multiple aspects of my life.  I think my efforts to quiet, slow, and calm it is time well spent.

The other day I talked about how I had received a mental lashing from my inner taskmaster, admonishing me for allowing my brain to go off on stupid tangents that do nothing but make me feel poorly.  It seems like such a stupidly simple concept, if you think negative thoughts, negative things are the result.  If you focus on happy, positive things your mind will reside there instead.  As simple as it sounds it’s consistent execution has not been easy for me, ever. This inability to keep my thoughts off the guard rails can affect multiple areas of my life, none of it with a good end result.  It can be borderline maddening at times.  I have been and continue to work on these issues.  Sometimes it feels like I run out of ideas of where to turn to for help.  Asking for help is something I am historically terrible at doing.  I think somehow I treat emotional or mental issues like most other hurdles in my life, something you just plow into, beating into submission with hard work, determination or brute force.  It’s not a good plan.

Today would have been my mom’s 75th birthday.  For all of my life it was always an interesting anomaly for me that my sisters birthday is October 16th, my mom’s was November 16th and mine is December 16th.  My grandmother just missed the pattern by a day as her birthday was September 17th.  Of course I think of Mom often but today will be more than the rest.  I miss her.